journal entry 5

I got knocked out of orbit for a bit. I’m still not back on track.

I had my surgery at the first possible opportunity: Thursday, June 15th. The aberrant growth that my surgeon, my oncologist, my endocrinologist, my gastrointestinal specialist, my nurse practitioner, and two radiologists were calling a tumor, turned out not to be a tumor – so said the hospital’s post-removal pathology. What was taken out was a growth of highly condensed “regular” pancreatic tissue with a greater than normal blood supply, which made it take up contrast differently and appear as a tumor when imaging was done – it even fooled a endoscopic biopsy.

So . . . it wasn’t a tumor and no cancer was involved. That should be news worth doing cartwheels over. But questions remain unanswered. Without the passage of time and additional testing results, I have no way of knowing if the growth held any responsibility for the symptoms that started this ball rolling. I’ll be seeing my oncologist and endocrinologist in the next few weeks to get their post-surgery take on all this. In the meantime, I’ll be testing my blood sugar several times a day, lowering my stress whenever possible, and doing a whole lot of self-monitoring. There’s not much else I can do – let time pass and gather data.

I was expecting – all concerned were expecting – a tumor of some type and one of two options: cancer; no cancer. We ended up with a third option that no one had even considered. I’m still not sure what to do with that.